Sean Smith

as Narrator

as Officer Stone

as Medical Examiner Stein

as Colonel Stanley Owlen

as Club Manager

as Vet

as Photographer

as Carl

as SEC Agent #1

as Dr. David Lyman

as Dr. Dresdin

as Bob

as Victor (Maitre'd)

as Ernest

as Yuppie Man

as Vic

as Maitre D'

as Waiter

as Announcer

as Loan Officer

as Charles Kolchak

as Mr. Keller

as Sam Tyler

as Storage Manager

as Alien Crewman

as Ted Goggle

as Mr. Munster

as Brad Cooper

as Steve Popovich

as Producer #2

as Immigration

as Waiter

as Sir Edward Ramsay (voice)

as Curtis Wenzel

as Maitre 'D

as Ken

as Maitre D'

as Johnson

as Singer

as Dave

as Chip

as Guy in Absurd Sweater

as Joseph Haydn / Aristocrat #1 / Constable #1 (voice)